Building Resilience: Adapting to misfortunes and setbacks
What is resilience and how is it defined?
“Resilience is the process and outcome of successfully adapting to difficult or challenging life experiences, especially through mental, emotional, and behavioral flexibility and adjustment to external and internal demands” (Amer. Psych. Assoc). A person has resilience when adversity or trauma strikes and anger, grief or pain follow, but then keeps functioning physically and psychologically. Lacking resilience, a person might feel victimized or turn to unhealthy coping mechanisms such as substance abuse, eating disorders (over/under eating), isolating, or other risky behaviors. Resilience does not make problems go away. It gives one the ability to see past them.
Tips to improve resilience
- Get connected: Build strong, positive relationships with loved ones and friends. Being able to reach out to others for support is a key part of being resilient.
- Make every day meaningful. Do something that gives you a feeling of purpose and accomplishment.
- Learn from experience. Think how you coped with hardships in the past and use these skills and strategies.
- Remain hopeful. The past cannot be changed but there is always the future.
- Take care of yourself. Tend to personal needs and feelings and participate in enjoyable activities and hobbies (e.g., daily physical activity, take painting or music lessons, eat healthy diets, or participate in stress management, and relaxation techniques).
- Be proactive. Determine what needs to be done, decide, and act. “Although it can take time to recover from a major setback, traumatic event or loss, know that your situation can improve if you work at it.”
Other tips for developing resilience (Kaiser Permanente): check in with your feelings, ask for help, make a list of your strengths (e.g., sense of humor, dependable, takes risks), make list of things that make you feel better (e.g., cooking, music, sports), practice mindfulness, avoid comparisons to others, and help others.
Sources: